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Of Suns and pooping goats

ShepCock

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The Suns owner filled his GM’s office with goats -- they pooped

Welp.

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On Monday, ESPN published an in-depth look into how the Phoenix Suns became one of the biggest disasters in the NBA. It’s worth your time to read how things got so dysfunctional, but for now let’s talk about goat poop.

Yeah, like goats ... pooping. Goat poop.

Four years after naming McDonough general manager, Sarver acquired some live goats from a Diana Taurasi event at Talking Stick Resort Arena and planted them upstairs in McDonough’s office. The stunt was both a practical joke and an inspirational message — the Suns should find a GOAT of their own, one who dominates like Taurasi. The goats, unaware of their metaphorical connotation, proceeded to defecate all over McDonough’s office.

In 2017, the Mercury celebrated Diana Taurasi with actual goats, in beautiful moment.

The Suns, not to be upstaged, thought they should get some goats too. One problem: They forgot that goats have a tendency to need to poop. WHO KNEW! So owner Robert Sarver buys goats, puts them in his GM’s office, and waits until he finds them.

Only to discover his office was covered in feces.

And so, I hate to pile on to the downtrodden Suns franchise, who are already dealing with pooping goats in their front office. But this is a thing that happened: Phoenix traded No. 6 (Jarrett Culver) for No. 11 (Cameron Johnson) and Dario Saric. That really happened. Johnson's a good player, but that was a reach that shocked most everyone. Getting No. 24 from the Celtics (which turned out to be Ty Jerome) along with a 2020 first-rounder was the only W in a night full of L's.

What a time to be alive. Go Suns.

 
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